Still Struggling

Have been trying to develop a new schedule to work around my part time job but so far it has not been working out. Mostly because I still have a bad attitude about the job. I know that it is way past time for me to “put on my big girl panties” and get on with my life but I just don’t want to! I feel guilty saying that because I know that I have been truly blessed to have been able to stay home for so long and it is no one’s fault but my own that I did not make better use of that time. I look at other women I know who didn’t/don’t have the choices I’ve had/have and I realize that I have no room to complain and yet I still do – ugh! Need to get my mind off what I wish I could have and focus on the blessings I do have because I do have many blessings.

Had the boy to the ER again – I do not know how it happened. Well actually I do know what happened, I just don’t understand how it happened. His foot got hit by a door and his toenail got bent back. It was very painful but thankfully nothing was broken. The doctor just bent the nail back down and that was it.  Seems to be healing okay.

I took a fall/slide down the stairs – I was trying to shut the door while simultaneous not step on the cat and missed the step. Since I was wearing  socks, I just started to slide and I tried to stop myself by grabbing the railing. As a result, I have a sore arm from my shoulder to my elbow and a lovely red/blue/purple bruise covering half of my butt. To make it worse it is the side I usually sleep on and that has caused a lot of awakenings throughout the night. Then I can’t get to sleep because so many things are running through my mind. I don’t know how I managed to teach and have a life at the same time. I just cannot seem to get things done anymore.

Well enough moaning and groaning – I’m off to get something done! I have bank statements to reconcile, bills to pay and tax information to sort. Hope you are doing something fun with your day.

Tidbit Tuesday

Just another sloppy/unedited edition of the random thoughts rolling around in my head today…

Another sunshine filled day although it is supposed to get cold again. I’m headed out later to enjoy the sun and warmth before that happens.

It is very hard to type when the cat is trying to help. Marco likes attention and he makes sure you give it to him. He is getting a bit better at getting off the counter when I tell him to which is an improvement – before I would have to chase him and put him down but now he is jumping down when he hears me yell.

Just noticed that Matthew left his flash drive plugged into the computer – that will make it hard for him to work on his project in school today. We need to get better at making sure that he puts it in his backpack when he finishes working.

March 1st – a new month – time to check my progress and set some new goals.

1.  I did very well with my step goal of 8500steps/day – only missed it once and got my average for the year up to 9000/day. My goal for this month is 9500 steps/day.
2.  I didn’t do as well with my sleeping at least 7 hours a night goal. I only made that 19 out of 29 days. I need to do a better job of getting to bed before ten pm from Sunday through Thursday. I can sleep a little later on weekends but during the work week I have to be up at 5:40am. Need to work on wrapping up my evening activities earlier which means I need to stop reading in the tub. I always say I’ll just read one chapter but that usually turns into two or three.
3. I started off doing well with the cleaning but have slacked off lately. It should get back on track as I prepare for the Progressive Dinner  for members of our church. We are the first stop and I’m trying to get things ready for company.  One other benefit of the dinner is that it lit a fire under hubby who cleared out massive amounts of stuff that had been stored in our upstairs. Since we are still in the process of renovating the house, the upstairs has been the storage space for all the stuff we’re not sure what we want to do with as well as the hubby’s personal “I might need/want this some day” space.
4. I did not get new bras – there were two lingerie stores that I had hoped to visit but they both went out of business.  I’m not really the Victoria’s Secret type of shopper. I’m not looking for “pretty” or “sexy” and I don’t like underwire at all. I just want something that will hold the girls up and not cost a fortune. However, it has been a long time and I really think I should get a proper fitting so I get the right size. Anyone have any recommendations for me?? Please leave a comment if you do. Thanks
5. I did order new glasses. The exam was quick and easy and I went with a pair for reading and a pair for driving. Of course two days after I ordered them, I found the long lost pair of glasses at my husband’s shop. I was sure I had lost them at a church event and never even considered looking for them at the shop. Apparently my hubby thought a customer had left them and had them in a drawer. He was cleaning things out and put them on the bookshelf where I found them and thought they looked familiar. Oh well, now I’ll have a spare just in case anything happens to the new ones.

New goals for March will be

1.  9500 steps/day
2.  Be in bed by 10 pm Sunday through Thursday and no later than 11 pm Friday and Saturday
3. Get house cleaned up for Progressive Dinner
4. Get new bras
5. Continue reading books from my shelf – trying to get through the 200+ that I have accumulated

What are your goals for March? Have you been working on a word for the year? Let me know in the comments. Until next time, have a wonderful day.

 

books read

I have been reading book reviews in the Twitterature link up on The Modern Mrs Darcy’s blog for the past several months and decided that I would like to try to join in.  Here is my first attempt – nothing fancy but it’s a start. Head over to her blog to take a look at one everyone else is reading this month.

Activate Your Goodness by Shari Arison – good discussion of how each and everyone of us can make a difference even if our action is small. My best take away – My suffering comes from within – I can choose to see things that happen as a way for me to learn and grow.

Goodnight Mind by Colleen E. Carney PhD and Rachel Manber PhD – Variety of tips and practices to aid in the development of quality sleep routines. My best take away – quality trumps quantity – don’t try to make up lost sleep in terms of hours in bed.

The Secrets of Happy Families by Bruce Feiler  – nice mix of research and practical application. My best takeaways – read The Five Love Languages, keep eating dinner as a family and talk about our ancestors.

One Word – Health

So, back in January I decided to get on the one word bandwagon. That’s the idea that you pick a word to focus on throughout the year. I chose health as my word and I was going to try and work on one aspect of my health each month.

I started with sleep because it seems to affect so many other things, especially weight gain/loss and mood which I also wanted to improve. I worked on my sleep environment, my pre-bed routine and trying to keep my wakeup and sleep times consistent. I did okay but had trouble staying consistent – my usual problem. I can do something for so long but never long enough for it to become automatic.

Next I tried to work on my water intake because it also seems to affect so many other things. I really struggled with this one. It takes a lot of effort for me to drink that much water. You would think that it would be easy since water is the only thing I drink but I don’t make it most days.

I decided to make an appointment with a functional medicine practitioner because I was getting tired of the way I was feeling and I wasn’t sure if the meds I was on were really helping me. (Background – I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism 18 years ago, have postpartum depression/dysthymia issues and am going through menopause) I had heard good things about this doctor and decided to see what she had to say.

There was a two hour initial meeting  that was very thorough and I felt like there was a possibility that things could change if I went through the testing she recommended. I wasn’t as excited about all the supplements she wanted me to try but figured it was worth a shot. She put me on an elimination diet which I was sure was going to be hell. I had to do blood, urine, hair and salivia testing as well.

I spent the weekend enjoying a last taste of my forbidden foods and was ready to start my new diet bright and early one Monday morning. I  was supposed to take a protein shake in the morning but I wasn’t really hungry so I put it off until lunch. I’m not really big on shakes or smoothies – its a texture thing – I just don’t like that thick stuff. This one smelled really bad and I had to force myself to drink it. In fact, it took about 30 minutes for me to drink it all.  It didn’t stay down long – I was in the bathroom throwing up within the hour. Later that evening I started feeling sick and ended up going to bed early.

The next morning I still wasn’t feeling well but I was hungry. I had a craving for an apple. I ate a slice but was back in the bathroom dry heaving. I  was still tired so I just went back to bed. Then I started having chills and aches. I thought maybe I had a stomach bug or something. I had no appetite and slept 12 – 16 hours for the next 4-5 days. I talked with the doctor and thought I might have the flu. I tried to rest and stay hydrated – not something I’m very good at.

Then I developed a red circular patch on my arm. It started out about the size of a quarter. It didn’t itch, it wasn’t crusty, it just got bigger and bigger. Then I noticed a few more on different parts of my body. Finally my husband convinced me to have them looked at. That’s when I found out that I had Lyme disease.

This is getting kind of long – I’ll stop here for now and finish up tomorrow.

One Word Update

I’m definitely not one of those people who can develop a new habit in 21 days. I’ve set two goals in regards to my one word -HEALTH- so far this year and I’ve needed more time to come even close to making them habits.

I am doing fairly well with my sleep routines. I’m doing very well with my bedtime routine and getting to bed on time but mornings are still rough. I’m continuing to try to get better and not beat myself up over the mess ups.

The water drinking has been more problematic. I got off to an okay start but then we went away for a few days and after that I got sick. I am up to at least 50 ounces a day but struggle to get past that. I’m still plugging away and hope to be at 64 by the end of the month. I need to work reminders into my daily schedule so that I reach for water on a regular basis and so that I think about trying a glass of water before I try a snack to fill me up.

Have you been working on your health or a one word goal of your own? I’d love to hear about your progress.

February Update and March Goal

Well I did okay with the February goal but I had trouble getting out of bed in the morning. I did my night time routine – no tv/computer after 9pm, bath and reading- 26 out of 28 nights. I was in bed before 10pm on 25 nights out of 28. However I only got up and moving by 6am on 11 out of 28 days.

I’m not sure what to do to get myself out of bed in the morning. It is just dark and cold and I’d rather stay in bed. Hopefully with Spring coming it will get easier to get out of bed in the morning.

I probably should work on adding some kind of exercise to my day or sticking to a maximum daily calorie count but I’m not ready nfor the kind of commitment. Instead I’ve decided to work on something else that will improve my health, drinking water. Almost everyone recommends that you get at least 64 ounces of water a day. I’m lucky if I get 32 ounces each day and since I don’t drink anything else, I’m sure my body needs more liquids. I decided to try to increase by one glass each week.

After the weekend I’ve realized that I need to have some kind of plan to help me get into the habit of drinking more than just a few sips here and there. I have a hard time trying to drink a full 8 ounce glass at one time. I’ve been using a five ounce glass and can usually finish it off with my meals. Now I need to add it to snack and other times to get my total up where I want it to be.

What’s your goal for this month??

My ONE WORD Update

As I mentioned last month, I have chosen to focus on one word this year. My word is HEALTH. In January I focused on my sleeping habits. The goal was to have a relaxing routine that prepared me for bed by 10 pm each night so that I could wake refreshed and ready to go at 6 am each morning.
In some respects it was a success – I did make it to bed by 10pm 23 out of 31 days and I spent 8 hours in bed 26 days. However, there were only 6 days that I woke up refreshed and ready to go. I did awaken by 6 am 23 days but for most of those days, I laid in bed listening to the radio and huddling under the covers.

My quality of sleep was not good and I need to do better at preparing for bed. I still need to be consistent in doing a relaxing routine before bed. Also I need to make some adjustments to my bedroom in terms of light coming in the room.

This month I will continue with developing the prebed routine. There will be no computer or tv after 9 pm, I will take a bath or shower and read a bit before heading off to bed for the night. I have some material to make coverings for the windows and hope to get DH to trim the doors. Otherwise I will have to move his chair so when he reads at night I’m not bothered by the light.

How did you do with your January goal??